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<channel>
	<title>Joke Gurus</title>
	<atom:link href="http://jokegurus.com/feed/" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>http://jokegurus.com</link>
	<description>The Ultimate Source Of Fun Jokes And Funny Pictures On The Internet</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Wed, 25 Feb 2009 11:15:32 +0000</lastBuildDate>
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			<item>
		<title>An important message from the global entertainment industry</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/25/an-important-message-from-the-global-entertainment-industry/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/25/an-important-message-from-the-global-entertainment-industry/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 25 Feb 2009 11:15:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Cartoons]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cartoon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Global Entertainment Industry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Internet Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Internet Security]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Law Suit]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Life Security]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pirate Bay]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Video Lecture]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Video Security]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=850</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This cartoon was send to me by a friend of mine with request to post it. This is inspired by YouTube muting sound of some of the videos in their web site and also by the latest <a title="law suid of The Pirate Bay" href="http://trial.thepiratebay.org/" target="_blank">law suit of The Pirate Bay.<br />
</a></p>
<p>Also, here is a nice video lecture about<a title="Internet life, security and rights" href="http://network.businessofsoftware.org/video/cory-doctorow-on-life-in-the" target="_blank"> Internet life, security and rights</a>.</p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-849" title="cartoonish" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/cartoonish.gif" alt="cartoonish" /></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Crossover Nintendo</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/16/crossover-nintendo/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/16/crossover-nintendo/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Feb 2009 17:34:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Crossover]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Game]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hedgehog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mario]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nintendo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Peach Princess]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Princess Peach]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Slutty]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=840</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It&#8217;s a pity that Mario wasted so much time in all those games trying to save Princess Peach. The slutty Princess tries it with The Hedgehog. DARN! Who&#8217;s next?

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It&#8217;s a pity that Mario wasted so much time in all those games trying to save Princess Peach. The slutty Princess tries it with The Hedgehog. DARN! Who&#8217;s next?<br />
<img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-839" title="crossover_nintendo_princess_peach_sonic_team_sonic_the_hedgehog_super_mario" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/crossover_nintendo_princess_peach_sonic_team_sonic_the_hedgehog_super_mario.jpg" alt="crossover_nintendo_princess_peach_sonic_team_sonic_the_hedgehog_super_mario" /></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Titanic FAIL</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/16/titanic-fail/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/16/titanic-fail/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Feb 2009 13:37:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Epic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Titanic Movie]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Underwear]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=837</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Almost EPIC moment! The Titanic guys are so hilarious, but look at the dude in white underwear behind them, showing as his ass. Almost as romantic as the Titanic movie.

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Almost EPIC moment! The Titanic guys are so hilarious, but look at the dude in white underwear behind them, showing as his ass. Almost as romantic as the Titanic movie.<br />
<img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-836" title="fail-owned-titanic-fail" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/fail-owned-titanic-fail.jpg" alt="fail-owned-titanic-fail" /></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Exploits of a mom</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/13/exploits-of-a-mom/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/13/exploits-of-a-mom/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 13 Feb 2009 10:15:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Cartoons]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cat]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Exploits]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hal 9000]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rober]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=833</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[My first cat was called HAL 9000, but Rober&#8217;);DROP TABLE students;&#8211; is too much! Funny though

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>My first cat was called HAL 9000, but Rober&#8217;);DROP TABLE students;&#8211; is too much! Funny though<br />
<img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-832" title="exploits_of_a_mom" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/exploits_of_a_mom.png" alt="exploits_of_a_mom" width="666" height="205" /></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Learning curves of popular MMORPGS</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/12/learning-curves-of-popular-mmorpgs/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/12/learning-curves-of-popular-mmorpgs/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 12 Feb 2009 13:37:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Advertisement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Eve]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Game]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Learning Curves]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mmorpgs]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=826</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I don&#8217;t know if this is advertisement of EvE or not, but suddenly i feel the need to test this game  

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I don&#8217;t know if this is advertisement of EvE or not, but suddenly i feel the need to test this game <img src='http://jokegurus.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-825" title="learning-curves-of-popular-mmorpgs" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/learning-curves-of-popular-mmorpgs.jpg" alt="learning-curves-of-popular-mmorpgs" width="800" height="777" /></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Birth of a super villain</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/11/birth-of-a-super-villain/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/11/birth-of-a-super-villain/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Feb 2009 14:09:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Life As We Know It]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ball]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Birth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blond]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blonde]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Prom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Super Villain]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Villain]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=821</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-820" title="birth-of-a-super-villain" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/birth-of-a-super-villain.jpg" alt="birth-of-a-super-villain" /></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Houston, We have a problem</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/09/houston-we-have-a-problem/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/09/houston-we-have-a-problem/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 09 Feb 2009 13:59:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Life As We Know It]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Moon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Russian]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Space]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Usa]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=816</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Hey, look at what I&#8217;ve found

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Hey, look at what I&#8217;ve found</p>
<p><img src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/houston-we-have-a-problem.jpg" alt="houston-we-have-a-problem" title="houston-we-have-a-problem" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-817" /></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/09/pan-galactic-gargle-blaster/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/09/pan-galactic-gargle-blaster/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 09 Feb 2009 11:21:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Life As We Know It]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Benzene]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Checkmate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chess]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chess Play]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chess Set]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cubes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fires]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gargle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Guide To The Galaxy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hikers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hitchhiker]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hitchhiker S Guide]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Knockdown]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Marsh Gas]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Marshes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mixture]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Odours]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Play One]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Silver Spoon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sprinkle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Suns]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=810</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Ever heard of chess-boxing? You play one round of chess and then one round of boxing. Who ever wins by knockdown or checkmate in any of the rounds, wins the game.
Well this is check-drinking. The rules are very simple. Who ever takes a figure drinks it.
The game reminds me of The Hitchhiker&#8217;s Guide to the [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Ever heard of chess-boxing? You play one round of chess and then one round of boxing. Who ever wins by knockdown or checkmate in any of the rounds, wins the game.<br />
Well this is check-drinking. The rules are very simple. Who ever takes a figure drinks it.<br />
The game reminds me of The Hitchhiker&#8217;s Guide to the Galaxy and the game Zaphod Beeblerox plays while drinking the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster. Too bad the real drink can&#8217;t be mixed on Earth</p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-811" title="pan-galactic-gargle-blaster" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/pan-galactic-gargle-blaster.jpg" alt="pan-galactic-gargle-blaster" /></p>
<p>And here is the chess set.<br />
<img src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/chess-drinking.jpg" alt="chess-drinking" title="chess-drinking" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-813" /></p>
<p>Taken from the The Hitchhiker&#8217;s Guide to the Galaxy the recipe for Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster is this:</p>
<blockquote><p>&#8220;Take the juice from one bottle of that Ol&#8217; Janx Spirit.<br />
Pour into it one measure of water from the seas of Santraginus V<br />
Allow three cubes of Arcturan Mega-gin to melt into the mixture (it must be properly iced or the benzene is lost).<br />
Allow four litres of Fallian marsh gas to bubble through it (in memory of all those happy Hikers who have died of pleasure in the Marshes of Fallia).<br />
Over the back of a silver spoon float a measure of Qualactin Hypermint extract, redolent of all the heady odours of the dark Qualactin Zones.<br />
Drop in the tooth of an Algolian Suntiger. Watch it dissolve, spreading the fires of the Algolian suns deep into the heart of the drink.<br />
Sprinkle Zamphour.<br />
Add an olive.<br />
Drink&#8230;but very carefully.&#8221;</p></blockquote>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>T-shirt design ftw!</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/03/t-shirt-design-ftw/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/03/t-shirt-design-ftw/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 03 Feb 2009 16:06:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Life As We Know It]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Government]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[T Shirt Design]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[T-Shirt]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=804</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I will never put on this shirt. Even if the government fucks me, I still want more of it 

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I will never put on this shirt. Even if the government fucks me, I still want more of it <img src='http://jokegurus.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_wink.gif' alt=';)' class='wp-smiley' /><br />
<img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-803" title="government-fuck" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/government-fuck.jpg" alt="government-fuck" width="687" height="692" /></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Heineken meets Star Wars</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/03/heineken-meets-star-wars/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/03/heineken-meets-star-wars/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 03 Feb 2009 12:22:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertisements]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Star Wars]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Beer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Heineken]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Local Store]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[R2d2]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=799</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I wonder did they start selling it in the local store. I&#8217;m so having one!

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I wonder did they start selling it in the local store. I&#8217;m so having one!</p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-798" title="r2beer2_r2d2_drunken_brother" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/r2beer2_r2d2_drunken_brother.jpg" alt="r2beer2_r2d2_drunken_brother" /></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Christmas cartoons collection</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/02/christmas-cartoons-collection/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/02/02/christmas-cartoons-collection/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 02 Feb 2009 17:23:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Cartoons]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cartoon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cartoons Gallery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christmas]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christmas Cartoons]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christmas Gallery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rudolph]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Santa]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Snowman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[X-Mas]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=790</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A big collection of Christmas cartoons.




































]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A big collection of Christmas cartoons.</p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-789" title="yellowsnowman" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/yellowsnowman.gif" alt="yellowsnowman" width="461" height="314" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-788" title="workinggirl" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/workinggirl.jpg" alt="workinggirl" width="357" height="510" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-787" title="whereiciclescomefrom" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/whereiciclescomefrom.jpg" alt="whereiciclescomefrom" width="275" height="388" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-786" title="usedtolaughatrudolph" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/usedtolaughatrudolph.jpg" alt="usedtolaughatrudolph" width="417" height="567" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-785" title="textingsnowmen" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/textingsnowmen.jpg" alt="textingsnowmen" width="628" height="481" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-784" title="snowwomanfake" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/snowwomanfake.jpg" alt="snowwomanfake" width="300" height="357" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-783" title="snowmanstickup" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/snowmanstickup.jpg" alt="snowmanstickup" width="554" height="349" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-782" title="snowmanbaby" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/snowmanbaby.jpg" alt="snowmanbaby" width="400" height="389" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-781" title="santayourinternetusage" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/santayourinternetusage.gif" alt="santayourinternetusage" width="312" height="207" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-780" title="santashot" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/santashot.gif" alt="santashot" width="353" height="388" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-779" title="santasexualharassment" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/santasexualharassment.jpg" alt="santasexualharassment" width="400" height="400" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-778" title="santaquickstop" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/santaquickstop.jpg" alt="santaquickstop" width="225" height="319" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-777" title="santapoo" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/santapoo.jpg" alt="santapoo" width="200" height="268" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-776" title="santaoverweight" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/santaoverweight.png" alt="santaoverweight" width="450" height="476" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-775" title="santaejected" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/santaejected.jpg" alt="santaejected" width="623" height="390" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-774" title="santacustomerprotection" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/santacustomerprotection.gif" alt="santacustomerprotection" width="303" height="326" /></p>
<p><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-773" title="santacourt" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/santacourt.gif" alt="santacourt" width="447" height="250" /></p>
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]]></content:encoded>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Courtroom Quotations</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/01/22/courtroom-quotations/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/01/22/courtroom-quotations/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 22 Jan 2009 14:22:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Internet Wisdom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cathy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Child Witness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Court Records]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Courtroom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Courts Of Law]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Date Of Birth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Defendant]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gucci Sweats]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hall Closet]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Iq]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lawyer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Look At My Face]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mask]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mrs Johnson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Myasthenia Gravis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Posterity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Purse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Quotations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Winchester]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=748</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The following quotations are taken from official court records across the nation, showing how funny and embarrassing it is that recorders operate at all times in courts of law, so that even the slightest inadvertence is preserved for posterity.


Lawyer: &#8220;Was that the same nose you broke as a child?&#8221;
Witness: &#8220;I only have one, you know.&#8221;



Lawyer: [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The following quotations are taken from official court records across the nation, showing how funny and embarrassing it is that recorders operate at all times in courts of law, so that even the slightest inadvertence is preserved for posterity.</p>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Was that the same nose you broke as a child?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I only have one, you know.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;By death.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And by whose death was it terminated?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Accused, Defending His Own Case:</span> &#8220;Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<p>The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.</p>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What is your date of birth?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;July 15th.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What year?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Every year.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Can you tell us what was stolen from your house?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;There was a rifle that belonged to my father that was stolen from the hall closet.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Can you identify the rifle?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Yes. There was something written on the side of it.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And what did the writing say?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;&#8216;Winchester&#8217;!&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Gucci sweats and Reeboks.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No.  He was wearing a mask.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What was he wearing under the mask?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Er&#8230;his face.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;This myasthenia gravis &#8212; does it affect your memory at all?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Yes.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And in what ways does it affect your memory?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I forget.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you&#8217;ve forgotten?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;How old is your son, the one living with you?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can&#8217;t remember which.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;How long has he lived with you?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Forty-five years.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;He said, &#8216;Where am I, Cathy?&#8217;&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And why did that upset you?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;My name is Susan.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Sir, what is your IQ?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Well, I can see pretty well, I think.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Did you blow your horn or anything?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;After the accident?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Before the accident.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Yes.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Yes, sir.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What did she say?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;&#8216;What disco am I at?&#8217;&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Did you check for blood pressure?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Did you check for breathing?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;How can you be so sure, Doctor?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And you check your radar unit frequently?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Officer:</span> &#8220;Yes, I do.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And was your radar unit functioning correctly at the time you had the plaintiff on radar?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Officer:</span> &#8220;Yes, it was malfunctioning correctly.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What happened then?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;He told me, he says, &#8216;I have to kill you because you can identify me.&#8217;&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Did he kill you?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Now sir, I&#8217;m sure you are an intelligent and honest man&#8211;&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Thank you.  If I weren&#8217;t under oath, I&#8217;d return the compliment.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;You were there until the time you left, is that true?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;So you were gone until you returned?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;The youngest son, the 20 year old, how old is he?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Were you alone or by yourself?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;How long have you been a French Canadian?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;He was about medium height and had a beard.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Was this a male or a female?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Mr. Slatery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn&#8217;t you?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I went to Europe, sir.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And you took your new wife?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;That&#8217;s me.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Were you present when that picture was taken?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Do you know how far pregnant you are now?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I&#8217;ll be three months on November 8.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Apparently, then, the date of conception was August 8?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Yes.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What were you doing at that time?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;How many times have you committed suicide?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Four times.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Do you have any children or anything of that kind?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;She had three children, right?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Yes.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;How many were boys?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;None.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Were there girls?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;You don&#8217;t know what it was, and you didn&#8217;t know what it looked like, but can you describe it?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;You say that the stairs went down to the basement?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Yes.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And these stairs, did they go up also?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Have you lived in this town all your life?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Not yet.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> <em>(realizing he was on the verge of asking a stupid question)</em> &#8220;Your Honor, I&#8217;d like to strike the next question.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Do you recall approximately the time that you examined the body of Mr. Eddington at the Rose Chapel?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;It was in the evening.  The autopsy started about 8:30pm.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And Mr. Eddington was dead at the time, is that correct?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What is your brother-in-law&#8217;s name?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Borofkin.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What&#8217;s his first name?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I can&#8217;t remember.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;He&#8217;s been your brother-in-law for years, and you can&#8217;t remember his first name?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No.  I tell you, I&#8217;m too excited.&#8221;  <em>(rising and pointing to his brother-in-law)</em> &#8220;Nathan, for heaven&#8217;s sake, tell them your first name!&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Did you ever stay all night with this man in New York?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I refuse to answer that question.</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Did you ever stay all night with this man in Chicago?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I refuse to answer that question.</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Doctor, did you say he was shot in the woods?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No, I said he was shot in the lumbar region.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What is your marital status?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Fair.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Are you married?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No, I&#8217;m divorced.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And what did your husband do before you divorced him?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;A lot of things I didn&#8217;t know about.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And who is this person you are speaking of?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;My ex-widow said it.</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;How did you happen to go to Dr. Cherney?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Well, a gal down the road had had several of her children by Dr. Cherney and said he was really good.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;All my autopsies have been performed on dead people.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Were you acquainted with the deceased?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Yes sir.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Before or after he died?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Mrs. Jones, is your appearance this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No.  This is how I dress when I go to work.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">The Court:</span> &#8220;Now, as we begin, I must ask you to banish all present information and prejudice from your minds, if you have any.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Did he pick the dog up by the ears?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What was he doing with the dog&#8217;s ears?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Picking them up in the air.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Where was the dog at this time?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Attached to the ears.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Other Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Objection.  That question should be taken out and shot.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And lastly, Gary, all your responses must be oral.  Ok?  What school do you go to?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Oral.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;How old are you?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Oral.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;What is your relationship with the plaintiff?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;She is my daughter.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Was she your daughter on February 13, 1979?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Now, you have investigated other murders, have you not, where there was a victim?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Now, doctor, isn&#8217;t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn&#8217;t know anything about it until the next morning?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And what did he do then?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;He came home, and next morning he was dead.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;So when he woke up the next morning he was dead?&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Did you tell your lawyer that your husband had offered you indignities?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;He didn&#8217;t offer me nothing.  He just said I could have the furniture.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;So, after the anesthesia, when you came out of it, what did you observe with respect to your scalp?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I didn&#8217;t see my scalp the whole time I was in the hospital.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;It was covered?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Yes, bandaged.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Then, later on&#8230;what did you see?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I had a skin graft.  My whole buttocks and leg were removed and put on top of my head.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Could you see him from where you were standing?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I could see his head.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;And where was his head?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Just above his shoulders.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Do you drink when you&#8217;re on duty?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;I don&#8217;t drink when I&#8217;m on duty, unless I come on duty drunk.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted murder trial?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;The victim lived.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;The truth of the matter is that you were not an unbiased, objective witness, isn&#8217;t it?  You too were shot in the fracas.&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;No, sir.  I was shot midway between the fracas and the naval.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
<hr />
<ul>
<li><span class="itemstart">Lawyer:</span> &#8220;Officer, what led you to believe the defendant was under the influence?&#8221;</li>
<li><span class="itemstart">Witness:</span> &#8220;Because he was argumentary, and he couldn&#8217;t pronunciate his words.&#8221;</li>
</ul>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Girls underwear collection</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/01/21/girls-underwear-collection/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/01/21/girls-underwear-collection/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 Jan 2009 15:34:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Girl Of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[403 forbidden]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[britney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[girl power]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Girlfriend]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Girls Underwear]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[i am bad]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[just do me]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex in the clitty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sexy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sexy girl]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[spank me]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sweet]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tech girl]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Underwear Collection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Undies]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=723</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[After I found this picture yesterday, I wanted to get some nice undies for my girlfriend. Looking around I found those designs.















]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>After I found <a href="http://jokegurus.com/2009/01/20/all-you-can-eat/">this picture</a> yesterday, I wanted to get some nice undies for my girlfriend. Looking around I found those designs.</p>
<p><a title="boom" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/boom.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-724 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/boom.jpg" alt="boom" /></a></p>
<p><a title="403-forbidden" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/403-forbidden.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-709 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/403-forbidden.jpg" alt="403-forbidden" /></a></p>
<p><a title="but-i-like-you" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/but-i-like-you.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-710 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/but-i-like-you.jpg" alt="but-i-like-you" /></a></p>
<p><a title="creditcard-underwear" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/creditcard-underwear.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-711 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/creditcard-underwear.jpg" alt="creditcard-underwear" /></a></p>
<p><a title="crtl-alt-del" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/crtl-alt-del.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-712 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/crtl-alt-del.jpg" alt="crtl-alt-del" /></a></p>
<p><a title="forget-about-it" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/forget-about-it.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-713 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/forget-about-it.jpg" alt="forget-about-it" /></a></p>
<p><a title="girl-power-wow" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/girl-power-wow.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-714 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/girl-power-wow.jpg" alt="girl-power-wow" /></a></p>
<p><a title="i-am-bad" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/i-am-bad.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-715 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/i-am-bad.jpg" alt="i-am-bad" /></a></p>
<p><a title="just-do-me" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/just-do-me.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-716 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/just-do-me.jpg" alt="just-do-me" /></a></p>
<p><a title="sex-in-the-clitty" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/sex-in-the-clitty.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-717 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/sex-in-the-clitty.jpg" alt="sex-in-the-clitty" /></a></p>
<p><a title="spank-me" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/spank-me.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-718 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/spank-me.jpg" alt="spank-me" /></a></p>
<p><a title="sweet" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/sweet.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-719 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/sweet.jpg" alt="sweet" /></a></p>
<p><a title="tech-girl" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/tech-girl.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-720 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/tech-girl.jpg" alt="tech-girl" /></a></p>
<p><a title="tighter-than-britney" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/tighter-than-britney.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-721 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/tighter-than-britney.jpg" alt="tighter-than-britney" /></a></p>
<p><a title="your-boyfriend-wants-me" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/your-boyfriend-wants-me.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-722 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/your-boyfriend-wants-me.jpg" alt="your-boyfriend-wants-me" /></a></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Chicks like Unix</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/01/21/chicks-like-unix/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/01/21/chicks-like-unix/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 Jan 2009 10:21:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Girl Of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[beach]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Beach Chicks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blond]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blond chicks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blonde]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[topless]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Topless Beach]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Topless Chicks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Topless On The Beach]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Unix]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Unix Books]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=707</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I love topless on the beach, but blond chicks with Unix books scares me!

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I love topless on the beach, but blond chicks with Unix books scares me!</p>
<p><a title="chicks-like-unix" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/chicks-like-unix.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-708 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/chicks-like-unix.jpg" alt="chicks-like-unix" width="640" height="480" /></a></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Kaka is priceless</title>
		<link>http://jokegurus.com/2009/01/20/kaka-is-priceless/</link>
		<comments>http://jokegurus.com/2009/01/20/kaka-is-priceless/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 20 Jan 2009 08:42:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dobber</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[80 Min]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ac-milan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[C Ronaldo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fiorentina]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[football]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kaka]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mastercard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mastercard Priceless]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Messi]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[milan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[priceless]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Priceless Mastercard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ronaldo]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://jokegurus.com/?p=704</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Eto&#8217;o &#8211; 80 million &#8211; With Mastercard
C. Ronaldo &#8211; 120 million  &#8211; With Mastercard
Messi &#8211; 180 million &#8211; With Mastercard
Kaka &#8211; Priceless



]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Eto&#8217;o &#8211; 80 million &#8211; With Mastercard<br />
C. Ronaldo &#8211; 120 million  &#8211; With Mastercard<br />
Messi &#8211; 180 million &#8211; With Mastercard<br />
Kaka &#8211; Priceless</p>
<p><a title="FBL-ITA-AC MILAN-FIORENTINA" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/kaka-is-priceless.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-705 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/kaka-is-priceless.jpg" alt="FBL-ITA-AC MILAN-FIORENTINA" /></a><br />
<br />
<a title="CALCIO: MILAN-FIORENTINA" rel="thumbnail" href="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/kaka-is-priceless2.jpg"><img class="attachment wp-att-706 alignleft" src="http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/kaka-is-priceless2.jpg" alt="CALCIO: MILAN-FIORENTINA" /></a></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		</item>
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