Dear Tech support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery
applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs
such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and
Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I’ve tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these
problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate.

DEAR DESPERATE,

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html
and try to download Tears 6.2 and don’t forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that
application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications
Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to
default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1
is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the
background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.) Also do
not attempt to reinstall Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported
applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying
additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend
Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,
Tech Support